Financial Concerns

I've been spending kind of a lot lately, but I think that's ok. I've been making considerably more money since I started working nearly full-time, and I haven't gone into debt at all. Naturally, it kind of puts a damper on the long-term savings I really should be doing. But come on, I'm only going to a state school, and financial aid will almost certainly be generous. What do you guys think? I know that most of you must be undergoing some financial woes, at the very least.

Sometimes I start thinking that my failings embarass and disgrace those around me, but when I think about it, the failings of others don't embarass me in the slightest. Even in that last sentence, I wondered if I used too many personal pronouns. I feel many things have changed about me in the past few months, since moving out of my Aunt's house and out fron under my parents' influence, but lingering, layered doubts about my own status, consideration for others, and myriad other non-sequitur remain. It's what keeps me relatively polite, and what allows me to make a good first impression (when I'm not throwing up on peoples' cars), but I sense it may hurt me later in life. Interesting that frank, positive self-evaluation is almost beyond my reach even now. I feel bad for mentioning any good traits I have, as though I'm denying I have any bad ones. Then I feel bad about feeling bad. But it's all an academic exercise, really, and nothing quite comes of it. That's going to change. From now on, I'm not going to care so damn much.

Yeah, I'm spending a lot of money these days. You know what? I can afford it right now. If you think I shouldn't because of your poor state of affairs, you can go ahead and shove it. (not you guys, but people in general)